Friday, March 14, 2008

A theme song

Do you have a theme song? I do.

It's weird. I never set out to have one, but when I hear a certain tune, I just identify with it. The song comes about whenever I'm doing something I believe to be distinctly me. Five to ten years ago, that something distinctly me would most often be me standing outside my office, smoking like a chimney and shooting the shit with one of my soldiers. Nowadays, my theme songs tend to pop up when I'm doing something on auto-pilot -- surfing the net, doing a chore, etc.

What's weird is that I've also attached theme songs to inanimate objects at various times in my life. My first car was a blue Ford Fiesta piece of shit that I named Zot. It's theme song was KISS' "God Gave Rock and Roll To You." And that happened entirely by accident. See, the car had a hard time running. It would overheat often -- especially when it was raining. One day when it broke down, I had a friend in the car with me and the song playing on the radio when it died was that KISS song. So we started singing the song to the car, kind of as a funny, and after we sang a couple of lines, with the requisite hands on the dashboard (I do believe the laying on of hands was an important part of the process), the car started back up. Of course we found this hilarious, so we'd sing the song any time we were in the car just to be safe. It worked well until one day I threw a rod. Oh well.

My next car was wonderful. It was a 1965 Ford Custom 500. Similar to the Fairlanes and Galaxies. It was a huge, white, four-door monster. I loved it. It runs to this day and is currently owned by my brother (after passing to him, to my grandfather and back to him). This was a great car and its theme song was Lenny Kravitz's "Are You Gonna Go My Way?" The song just seemed to radiate from the car as I drove down the road. Its six-cylinder engine thumped in time to the beat of the song. Ultimately the car has had more staying power than Kravitz's career it seems.

I have even made up my own personal theme songs for some things. At my last job I had to use this old '99-era G3 Mac with Quark 3-point-something to do layout and design. My song was simple. If fact, it only had two words, repeated mantra-like to a speed-metal riff "You suck you suck you suck you suck you suck ..." ad nauseum.

It sucked.

Nowadays I drive a little white Toyota Camry to and from work. It has yet to speak to me. Our family vehicle is a big Dodge Durango. I'm not yet sure of its song yet either, but sometimes it seems to like Black Label Society. I'm not sold on that yet. We'll see.

Oh, what's my song? Right now it's Mr. Bungle's "Secret Song." I'll try and put up a link later today.

UPDATE: OK, I was able to find it on YouTube. This is the song Carry Stress in the Jaw. The Secret Song begins at mark 4:44.

So, any of you got one?

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