I was raised by a devout Christian mother. My youth was spent in church and Christian schools and up until about 8th or 9th grade, it never really occurred to me to question the validity of what I had been taught for so long.
So of course I rebelled like someone was sticking me with a hot poker.
But over time, and more and more each year, I find myself being drawn back to the teachings of my youth. I believe it's because I sense the inherent rightness of it, but I'm willing to admit that it could be because it's a strong sense of the familiar. The point I'm getting to here is that one of the things I rebelled strongly against was the aspect of fate in Christianity. I never liked the idea that our lives were predestined.
Whether it be tied to religion or no, the theory that our lives are playing out in some predetermined path is kind of depressing, no? You think you could buck the system, but your bucking the system is already determined, accounted for, and written into the script. The thing that really threw me for a loop ... throws me for a loop still ... is that the Bible speaks of free will. Christianity makes a HUGE deal out of it because free will is what makes faith so strong. This is a readily observable phenomena -- take recent actions by extreme Muslims, the abortion clinic bombing Christians, or go back and look at Jonestown. When a person has committed their beliefs to something, that faith is a very strong thing.
However, how does one reconcile free will with predestiny? If you really have free will doesn't that imply that fate wouldn't necessarily know what your choices would be? Doesn't that mean that God has put you in control of your destiny?
This dichotomy is hard for me to wrap my head around. But one thing I'm willing to do now that I wasn't when I was younger is admit that there are things beyond my comprehension.
So, I accept that there is fate. And I pray that things work out according to the plan. And I hope that my choices don't hurt my family.
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